Posted - 08/18/2011 : 07:38:09 AM
| Back to School
Early one morning, a mother went in to wake up her son.
'Wake up, son. It's time to go to school'
'But why, Mom? I don't want to go.'
'Give me two reasons why you don't want to go.'
'Well, the kids hate me for one, and the teachers hate me, too!'
'Oh, that's no reason not to go to school. Come on now and get ready.'
'Give me two reasons why I should go to school.'
'Well, for one, you're 52 years old. And for another, you're the Head teacher!'
Free Bus To School for Granny
A 106-year-old Norwegian woman received an offer from local authorities for free bus rides to the school where she is supposed to attend next autumn Will and Guy have learned. Ingeborg Thuen, born in 1897 when the Klondyke gold rush was going strong, actually started school just before she turned six in 1903. Computers in the Os township near Bergen, Norway, read the '97 of her birth year as 1997, meaning she would be starting the first grade the next autumn.
She welcomed the free ride, saying that the last time she started school, she had to walk for an hour every morning. The letter from the township also encouraged Ingeborg's parents to list the children she would like to have in her class.
'Since I can already read, maybe I should skip a couple grades,' she joked to us.
A Funny Poem for Your First Day at Senior School
I'm Late For School
I got up late for school today,
And nearly missed the bus!
I hurried down the stairs,
Wolfed my toast, and caused a fuss!
I quickly threw books in my bag,
My pens, my lunch and shorts.
Grabbed my coat from out the cupboard,
Took my bat and ball for sports.
I slid across the kitchen floor,
And hopped around the cat!
Then expertly rolled over,
Jumped back up and grabbed my hat!
I belted out of our front door,
Spun round and swung it shut.
Saw the bus was waiting for me,
I felt I had time to strut!
I climbed aboard and then froze still,
And knew that things weren't right!
My friends fell down in fits of fun,
And pointed with delight!
My face went red, I couldn't breathe,
For in my haste I knew!
I'd forgotten to wear trousers,
Jumper, shirt, my socks and shoes!
The Golden Rule of Teaching - Know your Pupils
A head teacher is making his rounds of the school when he hears a terrible commotion coming from one of the classrooms. He rushes in and spots one boy, taller than the others, who seems to be making the most noise.
He seizes the lad, drags him to the hall, and tells him to wait there until he is excused. Returning to the classroom, the head teacher restores order and lectures the class for half an hour about the importance of good behaviour.
'Now,' he says, 'are there any questions?'
One girl stands up timidly. 'Please sir,' she asks, 'may we have our teacher back?'
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